Thursday, March 28, 2024

Our New Cuckoo


You should write the word Cuckoo in your calendar on the date August 9th right now, because the forthcoming horror movie starring Euphoria's Hunter Schafer and everybody's favorite ex-Downton dandy Dan Stevens is one we should all be excited about. Why? Because the writer-director is named Tilman Singer and he's put out one movie to date -- Luz in 2018, and Luz kicked un holy ass. Here is my review of Luz -- I said that "it digs out a ragged little mark of flesh, the sort of scar you won't forget soon; I felt corrupted." 

Does that not sound like the mark of an excellent horror movie to you? (Our friends at Altered Innocence, always on the ball, put Luz out on blu-ray and you should snag yourself a copy ASAP.) Anyway it's been a bit of a wwait for Tilman to get another movie out but Cuckoo sounds like it's worth the wait; here's how Neon describes the movie:

"Reluctantly, 17-year-old Gretchen leaves her American home to live with her father, who has just moved into a resort in the German Alps with his new family. Arriving at their future residence, they are greeted by Mr. König, her father's boss, who takes an inexplicable interest in Gretchen's mute half-sister Alma. Something doesn't seem right in this tranquil vacation paradise. Gretchen is plagued by strange noises and bloody visions until she discovers a shocking secret that also concerns her own family."

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

 ... you can learn from:

Phantasm (1979)

Jody: I just don't get off on funerals, man. 
They give me the creeps.

A happy 45 to the legendary Phantasm today!



Five Frames From ?






What movie is this?


Good Morning, World


And speaking of the Road House remake, again and again and again -- even though yes I promised I was done with it, what can I say I lieeeeee -- actor Beau Knapp got ridiculously beefed up for the movie too, even though he ended up not having a ton of screentime in it (and none really where his beef was showcased like Jake's constantly was). But that's okay because that's what we have social media for -- he posted his own pile of beefcakery on his Instagram and I've got it here for us this morning. And I mean it's not that Beau wasn't in good shape the last time I saw him with his clothes off, in my beloved yet deeply underappreciated 2020 horror film Mosquito State -- it just wasn't quite this level of trade. He was a believable statistics nerd in that! Here... notsomuch. Actors be wild, is my point. Hit the jump for the rest...

Wednesday, March 27, 2024

Every Time I Think I'm Out...


... Road House keeps pulling me back in.

Caught Butlering


The thing about Austin Butler is... it's complicated. On the one hand I'm not at all convinced he's the huge talent he's being sold as these days. I didn't think he was all that great in Baz Luhrmann's Elvis. He was fine, he did what was asked of him; unfortunately Baz didn't feel like digging beneath the surface. But even more annoying to me is I'm really finding the reaction to his performance in Dune 2 completely overblown -- Feyd-Rautha is a role that any actor could have managed to make an impression with, especially with that make-up job, and I didn't feel Butler went particularly beyond that. Having now seen the movie twice I can confirm that initial impression -- he felt yet again to me like a lightweight playing dress-up. I did not sense legitimate menace or threat from him for a second of that performance.

But there is another hand! The other hand is that I did like him a lot as Tex Watson in Quentin Tarantino's Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. And having seen Jeff Nichols' upcoming movie The Bikeriders a very very long time ago I thought he was a stand-out in that as well. It's a character that's all surface cool and sexy while being kind of a dumb nothing underneath that, and hey whaddya know he pulls that off. So... it's complicated. Like I said. 

Which leads me to today's complicated news -- Deadline is reporting that he's teaming up with Darren Aronofsky for a crime thriller called Caught Stealing, based on a 2004 book by Charlie Huston (thx Mac). It's about "a burned-out former baseball player... unwittingly plunged into a wild fight for survival in the downtown criminal underworld of ‘90s NYC." The book cover says it's got a "wrong man plot worthy of Hitchcock" and lord knows I love me one of those -- so if Darren Aronofsky wasn't himself coming off of his worst movie (by leaps and bounds) I might be excited about this right now! 

Alas the stench of The Whale still lingers, and a big part of me worries that nobody involved in the making of that piece of shit really got what a piece of shit it was given that its lead still won Best Actor for it. Aronofsky, who's given me some of my favorite movies of ever, really has to win me back with this next one. A lot's on the line! And casting Austin Butler isn't exactly the homerun I want it to be. But fingers crossed anyway. I hope the boys do deliver a proper Hitchcockian wrong-man movie and we can all skip together hand in hand into the future like one big happy family. Let's keep the dream alive. Let's do it for this guy:



Today's Fanboy Delusion

 Today I'd rather be...

... enjoying sweather weather with Gavin Leatherwood. (via)

Kinds of Awesomeness


One assumes that one and all have already witnessed the teaser trailer for Yorgos Lanthimos' new movie Kinds of Kindess this morning, before one clicked over here to this website -- and yet we post it. We must. It's given us goosebumps, it has! It does exactly what a teaser should do -- tease us, give us no idea of a plot, just a bunch of ridiculously alluring and disturbing images, an idea of the outrageous cast (Emma Stone, Willem Dafoe, Jesse Plemons, Margaret Qualley,  Hunter Schafer, Hong Chau, Mamoudou Athie, and Joe Alwyn) and some goddamned Annie Lennox. What else does one need? Granted I was sold on this movie before insemination so perhaps I don't speak for one and all. But I speak for the people who matter. Watch:

Kinds of Kindess will be out on June 21st.



Five Frames From ?






What movie is this?


Good Morning, World


Make like Charles Melton and get yourself 
half-dressed and let's get this Wednesday rolling.

Tuesday, March 26, 2024

Pretty Luca


Now here is a big bit of news I never expected to report -- Luca Guadagnino's next movie will star The Julia Roberts? Yes, the Pretty Woman one. In a movie from the guy who made a teenager fuck a peach! Will wonders??? Anyway it's actually Luca's next next movie after Queer with Daniel Craig, which is already in the can. Or it probably is Luca's next next one -- the Deadline article about it makes it sound like Amazon is moving full steam gung-ho ahead on this, but Luca's got several other projects currently announced, like the other gay one with Josh O'Connor we just heard about yesterday. Good grief this man can't help himself, he announces everything and then slowly makes a movie every three years. But to get to what this movie will be, it's called After the Hunt and it's a "thriller" and here is how they describe the plot:

"The film is an intense dramatic thriller about a college professor (Roberts) who finds herself at a personal and professional crossroads when a star pupil levels an accusation against one of her colleagues and a dark secret from her own past threatens to come to light."

Obviously it sounds like this is one that's going to deal with #MeToo and consent and power imbalances in relationships and yadda yadda blah blah blah which are all subjects that Luca's shared complicated feelings on previously (and they're subjects worthy of complicated feelings) -- gosh I sure do hope it gets those "age difference" conversations going again though, cuz I sure did enjoy that bullshit the first time around with Call Me By Your Name. (Do note my sarcasm.) Anyway good for Luca, good for Julia, good for us all. Pat yourself on the back. We made this happen.

The Last Hunk on Earth


Vikings and Heels actor and MNPP fave Alexander Ludwig has signed on to star in Earth Abides, a limited-series adaptation of George Stewart's acclaimed 1949 sci-fi classic novel about a " brilliant but solitary young geologist living a semi-isolated life who awakens from a coma only to find that there is no one left alive but him … there are no rules. His journey is to learn the difference between sanctuary and survival and to open his heart to love if he is to find meaning in his life." Further, the page on Amazon for the book calls Alexander's character an "intellectual." Yeah. Um. So... I guess Alexander is looking to flex a different muscle than usual with this role. And bless him, let him try. Who knows! Surprise us, Alex!


Five Frames From ?






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Good Morning, World


Only 10 days until Mary & George drops on Starz here in the U.S.! Here is the trailer in case you missed it -- this is the series from Living director Oliver Hermnus starring pretty boy Nicholas Galitzine alongside on Miss Julianne Moore as the royal-fuckers who got one over on the hornt up King James by serving little Georgie-boy here up on a sexy platter. Kingdoms have fallen for much much less! Anyway the show already aired in the U.K. a month ago so perhaps some of you have seen it? I've had screeners for weeks but inexplicably haven't started them yet. I should be lashed... and Nicholas here should be just the boy to do it. 

Monday, March 25, 2024

Pic of the Day


Over the weekend the photographer Claudio Carpi was nice enough to share this photo of Jake Gyllenhaal in character for Road House promotional duties -- this is a variation of the shot that ended up on the poster of course but here it is unadorned in all of its natural glory. Although I hesitate to call this Jake "natural" given the shaving and waxing and spray-tanning and uhh whatever else was going on to make him look like he looked in Road House. I got a few comments over the past few days on our previous Road House posts from people who've watched the movie since its release last Thursday...

... but if you watched it and haven't share your thoughts, the comments of this post are the place! I decided it's not really worth my time to write a full review, given how "meh" my thoughts are -- it has its moments, but after watching it I still really don't know why it exists. Everything truly weird and memorable about the 1989 film was wiped away for an ocassionally fun but pretty generic action movie. A good thread about one of the movie's most glaring issues can be read via MNPP pal Brandon Lewis on Twitter below (click over to read the entire thing):

In summation this photo of Arturo Castro & Billy Magnusson
is the hottest bit of business to come out of this whole thing (via):


Cory Michael Smith Fifteen Times


Believe me, I am appreciative of the fact that I am following up a post about being fine with straight actors playing gay (as long as they're Josh O'Connor and Paul Mescal anyway) with two posts in a row about queer actors -- call it my queer penance! Not that I wouldn't want to post about Cole Escola & Conrad Ricamora, or not that I wouldn't be posting this Numero Netherlands photoshoot of May December scene-stealer Cory Michael Smith. I haven't paid a ton of attention to CMS in the past, but he was so good in May December (and I did really love his movie 1985)... and how did I just remember he also showed up to steal a scene in Carol too? Not once during the May December awards run did that thought occur to me. Huh. And CMS was great in Olive Kitteredge too so I really should be giving him more attention at this point. My bad. Anyway hit the jump for the very hot photos...

Oh Mary & Abe


I realize that, even though the play got extended here in NYC several times, the audience of human beings on this earth that have gotten to see Cole Escola's hilarious play Oh Mary! imagining the deranged relationship between Mary Todd Lincoln (Escola) and her husband Abe (Conrad Ricamora) is minute. But I saw the damn thing and loved every over-the-top hilarious second of it, so I'm gonna post about it -- specifically a fun interview with Escola and Ricamora over at Queerty today, where the pair try on silly outfits at a local thrift shop and talk about their own queer histories. Of course after this play and his sexy turn in Andrew Ahn's gay rom-com Fire Island I'm nursing a big ol' crush on Ricamora so that doesn't exactly hurt either...


The Answer My Friend is Blowin' in Timmy's Hair


The internet was ablaze -- ablaze I tells ya! -- with photos of TImothee Chalamet out in NYC over the weekend shooting his forthcoming and long gestating baby Bob Dylan biopic A Complete Unknown with director James Mangold. Just google them and you can find more -- I don't care. Y'all know my feelings about Timmy and I'll see this movie but I am not in the slightest a Dylan fan and kind of resent that I'm being made to care about this movie. And now even moreso, because today they've announced a heaping pile (a piling heap?) of actors who've joined the movie's cast and there are several names of import. Mainly the ones that matter to me are Boyd Holbrook, Scoot McNairy, and Gossip Girl hottie Eli Brown...

There's no word on who anybody is playing yet so don't ask. But those three snacks aren't the only names dropped -- there's also "Dan Fogler (Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them), Will Harrison (Daisy Jones & The Six) …... P.J. Byrne (Babylon), Nick Pupo (Halt and Catch Fire), Big Bill Morganfield, Laura Kariuki, Eric Berryman (Atlanta), David Alan Basche (Egg), Joe Tippett (Monarch) and James Austin Johnson (Saturday Night Live)." Plus the previously annouced Edward Norton and Elle Fanning. Sigh. At least I'll have nice faces to look at while I suffer through more Dylan mythologizing. And Timmy's hair looks lush. It's the little things! Or in the case of Timmy's hair, the big ones.



Josh Goes Gay Again & Again


As seen there Josh O'Connor and Paul Mescal are currently shooting The History of Sound, the upcoming WWI-era gay romance from Moffie and Living (and the imminent Mary & George series) director Oliver Hermanus -- see my first post about that here. Both allegedly heterosexual actors have shown quite the fondness for feigning homosexuality for receptive gay directors and appreciative audiences and it looks like Josh is up to it again -- word on the street (i.e. Variety) is that he's probably going to star in another movie with his Challengers director Luca Guadagnino, this time an adaptation of writer Pier Vittorio Tondelli's gay romance Separate Rooms. (I should add "out of print" -- I went to buy a copy and they're selling for $250, good grief.) Here is how it's descibred: 

"The success of Tondelli's (1955-1991) melancholy Italian novel relies almost solely on the narrator's voice, which is steady, honest and believable. It is the voice of Leo, an Italian writer whose German lover, Thomas, has recently died. On a plane from Paris to Munich Leo reminisces about their relationship, which influenced his life in myriad ways. Their attraction to each other was so intense and troubling that at one point Leo suggested that the only way they might survive each other would be to live apart and travel together each summer--hence the "separate rooms" of the title. Leo's story is a road novel of memory. He recounts experiences in various cities, and all add up to his failure to accept Thomas's death and the possibility of new love. The translation is slightly clunky at times but generally unobtrusive, and Leo's emotions and thoughts on topics ranging from his childlessness to the decay of old Europe are unique and expressed in tangible terms--when he returns to his childhood home in the Po Valley and feels displaced there, he can barely swallow the food his mother prepares for him, "the food from his own land." This was Tondelli's last novel, and his first to appear in English."

Anybody read it? Anyway I am sure Josh will get barraged with more questions about taking roles from gay actors and let them be asked, whatever. I can't get too worked up about it since Luca wants to keep working with Josh. I also would want to keep making Josh do gay stuff. And I want to keep watching Josh do gay stuff. It's really working out for all of us. Except for gay actors. In related news the only actor with ears to rival Josh O'Connor's, totally gay Russell Tovey -- who is currently shooting his own gay movie in upstate New York -- used his weekend off to hang out with Josh's current co-star Paul Mescal and director Oliver Hermanus (plus Femme actor Nathan Stewart-Jarrett):



Five Frames From ?






What movie is this?